Masala zindabad? Mard

I'm speechless. I think Mard must have come to me (thanks PPCC!) as Bollywood's retort to my hubris of thinking I am capable of understanding popular Hindi cinema. I am duly humbled.

So bad it's good? Crazy/genius? Cartoonish/clever? Fantastical/relevant? A generous feast of R(ecommended) M(asala) A(llowance) ingredients or wallowing, shameful gluttony like Mr. Creosote in The Meaning of Life? I have no idea! It seems so wrong to label Manmohan Desai, the Master of Masala himself, as finally off his rocker and backwass/masala madness extravaganza/decline and fall masala, a.k.a. teetering towards embarrassingly debauched and past its prime, but what else can a person do with all the tiger namaste-ing, rubber mask peeling, plane lassoing, still-alive burning, baby scarring, hut rocking, life bleeding, Maa muting, salt rubbing, cake hiding, torture flamenco dancing, and statue animating? I don't expect my brain to process this any time soon, so you're better off sticking with PPCC, Philip's Fil-ums, Memsaab, The Horror!?, or Bolly Bob, to name a few.

The only thing in this movie I could make any sense of whatsoever was a sneaking feeling that I recognized the Britishers' palace.

For once in my life I was correct - I always think I recognize people, and I'm wrong at least half the time - because I stayed at the Lalita Mahal Palace Hotel in 2006 and spent every waking minute wandering around wide-eyed and feeling quite like a rajkumari indeed.

It's probably a good thing I didn't know about Mard then, or I would have made all my traveling companions reenact scenes with me.

And a lot crazier after watching Mard.


Temple said…
Beth - I think Mard is most entertaining. Where else could I have learned that I could stop a plane simply by lassoing it, and tying it to a post (just like a horse)? Like your good self, I have sat through many a movie of debatable quality but rarely one that fits so comfortably into the so-bad-it-is-brilliant category. The WTFs never stop coming, everyone seemed to have thrown themselves into the plot to turn my brain inside out, and I just couldn't stop watching it. We should stop questioning, and just be grateful that the horse and the dog never turned their amazing abilities against mankind...
Oh - and any movie that has Amitabh arrive in a cake is going to get into my good books.
Rum said…
Lol agreed temple, this movie is at home, forever in my dvd player because on a rainy day you just need to laugh at the idiotic costumes such as King Dara in gladiator clothing or Amrita in some "Booberella" from the simpsons ! Its fantastic!
Banno said…
I need to watch this again and get a little bit crazy too. Can't even remember half that stuff happened. Wow!
Temple said…
Rum - and let's not forget villainous Danny in his stylish ensemble of chains and cape.
Anonymous said…
LOL, Beth, I should have saved our chat history so I could copy and paste it here...

I've seen this about three or four times since I first watched it not that long ago, and I continue to find new stuff in it to appreciate. Thanks for the link to Philip's review---I had not seen that, and it made me feel a little less like a crazy person for loving this and feeling that it isn't just insanity but has a lot to say too. He put it beautifully into words I wish I'd said abot it :)

We should do a Roti watchalong---I would love to get your take on that.
Things I will never get over from this movie:
1- That carving of that name on the infant's chest- I wanted to gag and throw up!
2- The horse running away w/ the horse statue in the end.
3- Those costumes w/ zero continuity- entertaining to the max!
4- Amrita's S&M costume- rofl.

I need to stop- it was such a insane movie- one for the ages, no doubt.
red42 said…
Great that you've watched this movie. It was recommended to me by one of my Hindi classmates as revenge for my lending them Koyla. And all I can say is that they now know me much better! What a great movie - excellent costumes and total insanity - great for a rainy afternoon. Love Big B in this too - so over the top - awesome!
Pitu said…
Ok confession time. When I was a kid, I LOVED Mard. Seriously LOVED it. Apparently I used to prance around the house screeching the song 'Sun Rubiya' at top volume and alternating that with 'Mard ko kabhi dard nahi hota!'. Also, I <3 the tiger. It does Namaste! Awwww!
Anonymous said…
Most Indians dislike Mard - a totally bakwas movie.

Anonymous said…
Most Indians should love this movie.Totally entertained movie.
NidaMarie said…
Lol-I own this, yet haven't seen. I'm not sure I'm ready for it-YET!

A watchalong would be fun-either with this, or as Memsaab suggested, Roti Kapada Aur Makaum. I just saw the latter last Sunday, and feel it needs a second viewing-though I absolutely loved it anyways!

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